Marriage is about giving, but don’t make the mistake of giving too much. “To have a good marriage, you need to be a good you,” says Bowman. “Learn how to prioritize and put boundaries around activities that keep you healthy and whole—activities like rest, relaxation, fitness and time with friends.” In other words, remember that scheduling “me” time into your day is not selfish, it’s a necessity. It will strengthen your relationship because you’ll have a saner version of “you” to bring to the “us” equation.
- Marriage has its good moments and its bad moments and you need to accept that it will not always be the best of times.
- You have to take the initiative to change things in the marriage even if your partner doesn’t make the first move.
- Marriage takes a lot of work and you have to be happy with yourself before you can make someone else happy.
“The key here is to be able to refocus yourself on your feelings, what IS working for you, what IS working for you both and then see what changes can be made.”