Some people damage their relationships without even knowing they are doing so. Psychologist Jill P. Weber outlines four essential steps one has to take before going into a relationship. First, you have to fully grieve your past relationships. Don’t use new relationships to escape the misery of a divorce and breakup. In grieving, acknowledge those experiences and take steps to help you move forward. Secondly, build your self-esteem. Do not wait until a new partner comes along. Do it on your own. Thirdly, eliminate partners that are toxic. Toxic partners bring out the worst in you. Rather, look for partners that bring out the best in you and are healthy, kind and emotionally attentive. Lastly, build your intimacy skills. Be aware of your preferences and dislikes. Learn how to communicate them to those who you love.
Key Takeaways:
- Before you start a new relationship, you should make sure that you give yourself time to properly grieve any past relationships.
- You should keep yourself from settling or picking a partner for the wrong reasons by working on building up your self-esteem.
- Stay away from poisonous relationships because you could be entering these relationships without know it, and strengthen your intimacy skills to be a good partner.
“Keep at the top of your mind that a new relationship will not be healthy if you are using it to escape the emotional misery of a divorce or breakup.”